Do You Believe in Love at First Sight? - Relationship advices
Yes, it certainly has worked for me. I set eyes on my ex husband at a civil event and knew that the attraction was mutual immediately I saw him with his friend and spoke to him. We lasted 33 years and were still in love by the finish, except that we had diverged so much in our values and expectations, we could not sustain the relationship on love alone because too much resentment and anger had crept in.
On another occasion, I knew I had fallen in love instantly with someone when our eyes met across a room, seeing him for the first time. It was amazing because it was so unexpected because he was not the type I would have expected to even be friendly with. That was before my marriage but circumstances just weren't right at the time to follow through. Thirty five years later he proposed but I was a different person by then and wanted something different with my life.
Falling in love at first sight is glorious when it happens because, for some inexplicable reason, it seems to be long lasting than the average relationship. Perhaps it is because we are prepared to let love unfold gradually in such circumstances rather than burdening it with our hopes and expectations. And, as the feelings are likely to be both passionate and exciting, there is more of a motivation to see where the attraction leads.
Falling in love is really down to our beliefs. If we believe that anyone can engage us in an instant, because we are expressive enough to allow it to happen, then it will always happen for us. If we are the cynical type who questions every potential relationship and are worried about its outcome, it won't get a chance to flourish because we will kill it with our negative expectations.
People who don't believe in falling in love at first sight are seldom likely to experience it for that very reason: they cannot have something positive materialising out of their negative beliefs, and fear of its consequences will keep such an experience from happening. But love at first sight is magical when it works because it carries with it the potential for something truly exciting and enjoyable.
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ELAINE SIHERA (www.myspace.com/elaineone) is an expert author, public speaker, media contributor and lifestyle columnist. The first Black graduate of the OU and a post-graduate of Cambridge University. Elaine is a Personal Empowerment and Relationships Consultant. Confidential advice is available on the quiz site. Author of: 10 Easy Steps to Growing Older Disgracefully; 10 Easy Steps to Finding Your Ideal Soulmate!; Money, Sex & Compromise, among others (available on http://www.amazon.co.uk as well as her personal website). She describes herself as, "Fit, Fabulous, Over-fifty and Ready to Fly!"
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